As my brother Dukes 50th birthday approached I began to take the time to think about his life. The childhood memories, those I can remember and those that began to slip away as I realize it had been 27 years. It seems like another world.
Sharing his passing is nothing short of a miracle. And this is my story.
I was a senior at UO, my mom living in N. Dakota, and my dad still in Vancouver. The basketball season was in the height of competition as March was quickly approaching. Practices were more focused and demanding. My mother came to visit and watched a game on a Friday night in Eugene and was leaving the following day to watch Duke play in Bellingham the next morning. After our game my coach announced there would be no practices this weekend. My mouth dropped and my heart elated as I realized I could go with my mom to watch Dukes game. His game being their conference championship game and it was going to be a great game against their rivals Central Washington.
We left Saturday, checked into the hotel and then went to the game.
Now when Duke played at Mountain View my dad sat at the highest point, dead center on one side of the bleachers. My mother sat on the other side, and I sat in the middle of The Mountain View Brew Crew. Like that would ever fly these days as students yelled at the refs and players, demeaning them as much as possible with chants like, “Nuts and bolts, nuts and bolts we got screwed!!!” And “Zebra zebra tall and stout, find your head and pull it out!!!” Among many other non mentionables I look back and think what an era. Packed crowds in a gym that was known as Thunder. As we entered the gym in Bellingham we all assumed out places. Dad on one side, mom the other, and me in the middle of it all.
Tip off...as the game began to roll into the second quarter I realized Duke looked pale. He was playing well by everybody’s standards and scoring as usual, but I noticed he looked slower and almost lethargic. I knew he had heart issues and was scheduled to have surgery as soon as the season was finished to correct a small valve in his heart. He had what is called Wolf Parkinson White Syndrome.
Back then was also the time when a player known as Hank Gathers died in the middle of a ball game and that thought actually crossed my mind. “What would I do if Duke dropped to the floor in the middle of this game. The crowed was cheering wildly around me as I was in the middle of the student section but I was dead still. “God No” I thought. Almost as if I was pleading for his life. If anything happened I knew I would push everyone aside to be by his side including the officials or whoever was around him. I may not know Karate but I know crazy!!!. I was ready to go and my senses on alert.
The game finished and we had secured the win. Later that evening Duke and I went out and partied with the players dancing, drinking and laughing celebrating the win. The following morning my mom and I went for breakfast with Duke and headed out to return to Eugene. My dad hung out the rest of the afternoon with Duke and spent time with him as well. Everyone returned home on Sunday to return to the normal schedule of the school week. Monday morning came and I could not pull myself out of bed. My mother nagged me to get up and go to class. I refused. Not 45 minutes later I had a police officer at my door telling me of the news. Duke had passed away early in the morning due to heart complications. They tried to resuscitate to no avail. The events that followed were obviously heart wrenching but the fact that I was there with my mom was a gift. She didn’t hear the news on her own or have to look for me on campus in a day when there were no cell phones. My mom knew at the age of 10 that his life would be short. She had felt like God had spoken to her that Dukes life would not be a long one. Crazy I know. And something that is not easily embraced. I never really accepted how she felt or what she sensed. A mother’s intuition.
The events that unfolded days prior only reveals Gods great love for us. The chances of the entire family having time with him just a day before he passed is miraculous. Out of Gods great love He orchestrated a masterpiece of a sweet melancholic symphony. The finishing of a life well lived. And I can truly say, even though I may never understand why this happened I absolutely whole heartedly trust God in His great love, to lead me, guide me and direct me in all my ways. One of my favorite scriptures is, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your paths” ~Proverbs 3:5-6. God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. The lines have fallen to me in pleasant places. I have a good inheritance.
This one single event of Dukes passing changed my life. Scriptures don’t just become words written in the scrolls of the book of life, but they become the very breath of life in me. I look to Him in all things And again, I stand in awe. I celebrate Gods goodness.
Duke Wallenborn 1969-1992
In loving memory,
Your Partner in crime and sister,
Staci
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